Thursday, June 27, 2013

Same Love

If any of you have seen me watch any chick flick you'd know, I'm a sucker for love. Like complete hopeless romantic. It's understandable for people to get sappy over The Notebook, Titanic, Pearl Harbor, or basically any Nicholas Sparks movie, but um I used to think High School Musical 2 & 3 (the first one sucks) was one of the greatest love stories ever told. Or maybe I just loved Zac Efron, that's still up for debate. 



If the two lovebirds don't end up together at the end, I permanently remove that movie from my memory. I'm all about the happy endings. And I get it, life doesn't always work out the way you planned, but still I like to always hope for the best. 

For me, banning same-sex marriage is like one of those movies without a happy ending. Who's to say who you can and cannot love? I don't necessarily have the best track record with guys (and by that I mean I went through a rough Justin Bieber look-alike slash frat star stage) but my friends still accepted me and my interesting choice of men. Just because they weren't attracted to the same people, didn't mean they forbade me to sought after who I liked. Which I think should be true for everyone. I personally don't like the same sex but I'm not going to stop or judge anyone who does. If it's love it's love! 



But don't take it from me, take it from Macklemore. In an industry obsessed with "F***ing B**ches" and "getting money" Macklemore takes the time to stand up for what he believes is right. Recently I downloaded his song called "Same Love." (watch it here

It has some powerful lyrics. 

He begins by saying: 

"When I was in the third grade, I thought that I was gay, 'cause I could draw, my uncle was, and I kept my room straight." 

Our society is so invested in stereotypes. We think that just because a girl doesn't wear makeup or a guy shows emotion, they're automatically homosexual. The stigmatization of the LGBTQ community leads others to feel they have to change themselves to fit in. Seems likes  lose-lose situation to me. 

"The right wing conservatives thinks it's a decision, and you can be cured with some treatment and religion." 

What? Did some politicians decide to be white upper-class men with all of the privileges? No, they were born that way. So stop hating on those who are different from you. No one needs treatment for being themselves. It's those who conceal their true selves that need all the help they can get. 



"America the brave still fears what we don't know." 

Damn, Macklemore is a musical genius. He said it perfectly. Yesterday, the Supreme Court ruled the Defense of Marriage Act unconstitutional, which means the federal government now recognizes same-sex marriages legal in the states in which it has already passed. This also means that the couples in the 13 legalized states can now receive federal benefits. Although this is a huge step in the right direction, there's still a long way to go. It's because we're afraid of change. 

"And God loves all His children is somehow forgotten...When I was at church they taught me something else, if you preach hate at the service those words aren't anointed...whatever God you believe in we come from the same one"

All my life until college, I went to a private school. For years, I was taught "right" from "wrong" and unfortunately something that was categorized as "wrong" was gay marriage. I don't think religious beliefs should tear us apart. Isn't the whole message of the Bible to love one another?! To accept the oppressed? No matter what or who you believe in, I think that we can all come to the consensus that everyone deserves to be respected. It's like the saying "don't judge someone because they sin differently than you." In absolutely no way am I saying being gay is a sin, I was just connecting it to the phrase. Just because someone is different than us, doesn't mean that they are wrong. 

"Have you read the YouTube comments 'man that's gay' get's dropped on the daily, we become so numb to what we're saying." 

So true. I remember growing up, I'd think it was cool to say words like retarded, lame, gay. I didn't even think twice about it because I didn't realize it was offensive. I was numb. But now I know that words can be some of the most hurtful things out there. 



"Live on and be yourself."

Macklemore, will you marry me? 

"No freedom 'til we're equal, damn right I support it."

I repeat, will you marry me? 

"No law is gonna change us, we have to change us." 

I cannot be happier about the Supreme Court rulings yesterday, but he's right, laws can't change us. Just because slaves were legally free didn't stop people from abusing them physically and emotionally. It starts with us. 

"Strip away the fear, underneath it's all the same love." 

PREACH. 


Sunday, June 16, 2013

space jam

No- the dorm rooms in college are not anything like the ones you see in those PB Teen magazines. Well, in my experience anyway it was far from that. My roommate and I were forced to make a tiny, lifeless room look uhh liveable. It was quite the task let me tell you. Especially for me because I am the ultimate pack rat. In order to make it look semi-cute we had to keep everything in place otherwise we'd literally drown in our mess. 

It's important to optimize your living space by strategically setting up your room. I needed the most space I could get so I chose to loft my bed. My roommate and I set up our beds so that we'd have room for sort of an entertainment area for people to come in and chill. We used this to lure people in. Gotta make friends somehow right?  Actually, I think the first week we tried to make friends by giving people food. 

So, since I had the space under my bed to use for a desk and shelving, I was able to put a lot of my storage containers on the shelves. I used the mini 3-drawer storage containers for makeup, hair accessories, jewelry, school supplies- you name it! 

Another perk of having a lofted bed was that I could hang things off of it. I found some hooks that I placed off the foot of my bed to hold things like coats, towels, bags, things like that. That way it didn't take away from the much-needed closet space. 

There were a couple of downsides to having a lofted bed, however. One being that it was very difficult to get up and down sometimes especially because there was no ladder. Yes, there were days when I would actually fall on the ground trying to get down from there. Good times. The absolute worst thing was when I would be in my bed all cozy and realize I needed something down below. I cannot tell you how many times I was up in my bed and would think of a brilliant idea and would have no where to write it down. Okay that actually never happened because I don't have very many brilliant ideas. More often than not, it was that I remembered I had an assignment due and needed to write it down in order to remind myself to do it. Other times, I'd drop my phone from my bed. Don't even get me started on the countless phone issues I had last year. Just don't.

I was looking online and found something that would've solved all one of my issues last year. It's a little storage for the side of your bed that could hold phones, notepads, pens, books. WHAT. I seriously want to relive Freshmen year all over again just to experience life with this. There's one from RHL that's called the "bedside buddy" otherwise you could probably find one somewhere else or even make one. 

I need to stop. This is giving me nostalgia. And making me want to admit something very embarrassing...

I actually loved living in the dorms. Mmmm those dirty tile floors and brick walls. Paradise. 

   


Wednesday, June 12, 2013

tolerations: it's the little things in life

After hearing life coach Meg Daly speak at one of my sorority's Chapter meetings, I asked her to share a little bit about what she talked about that day. We did a simple exercise (read about it below!) that really made me rethink everything. Basically, the secret to being happy is to get rid of the little things that you have to deal with on a daily basis that might not be ideal. Like...always being cold in class, for example. The solution seems obvious- wear a sweatshirt. Sometimes we're so caught up in schoolwork, friends, jobs, and the millions of other things that we can't see the simple solution. Sometimes, a different perspective on life can make all the difference. Once we rid ourselves of the little things that bother us every day, we'll have more time to grow in other areas of life. 


With all the pressures facing high school and college students today, it's no wonder the stress levels of teenagers are at a record high. It seems that the "work hard, play hard" attitude is instilled in every freshmen's mind- and gradually increases in intensity throughout their undergraduate career, and more realistically throughout their life. The majority of the time, the work hard part of the equation can get a little out of hand. Depending on your weekend festivities I suppose the play hard part can get a little out of control as well ;) Actually though, everything you have to deal with on a day-to-day can suddenly pile up and prevent you from reaching your full potential. They always say "it's the little things". Well, what if you started ridding your life of these little things to see your stress slowly dwindle away? Crazy how that works- the less stress you have, the happier you'll be. 

And that concludes my long introduction. Listen to what the expert has to say and try the exercise for yourself...


Removing Tolerations=More Energy for the Good Stuff!

Imagine a day where your mornings are peaceful, smooth, and you never forget your where you put your keys! Imagine your school or work day running like clockwork with homework or presentations always on time. Imagine your evenings as a time for relaxation, fun and and uninterrupted sleep due to something called BALANCE in your life.

Sounds pretty cool, right? It may even sound unattainable to some of you... but it’s not! What’s one of the keys to creating balance in your life? The answer is removing tolerations that are bogging you down! It’s a pretty simple exercise that if you do on a consistent basis creates a whole lot of happiness in your life.

What are tolerations? It’s a fancy coaching term for energy drains in your life. Tolerations are basically things we tolerate on a day to day basis which we’ve learned, unfortunately, to live with. They can be as simple as never having a fully charged phone to putting up with super toxic people in your life. The scary part about tolerations, however, is how much they hold you back. The beauty of removing them is it’s unbelievable how EASY life begins to flow and the magical things which come into your life once there is space!

We find tolerations in several areas of our lives:
1. Home environment
2. Work environment
3. Financial areas
4. Personal relationships
5. Self Care
6. Food, nutrition
7. Technical equipment
8. Personal characteristics
9. Personal products

Within those areas are various examples of tolerations:
Toleration examples:
*Cluttered bedroom
*Sticky notes everywhere
*Always late for class
*Never paying bills on time
*Dirty kitchen
*Toothbrush needs to be replaced
*Issues with computer/printer/phone
*Aches and pains
*Friends always late
*Clothes that don’t fit
*Needy friends
*Can never find your keys
*Can never find a pen or paper
*Noisy neighbors
*Hair dryer not working right
*Never have enough food in fridge
*Roommates always eating your food
*Not enough healthy snacks
*Despise paying bills
*Always running out of money
*Moldy food in fridge
*Beauty routine in morning takes too long
*Never enough hot water in shower
*Difficult advisor or professor
*Issues with friends
*Issues with family
*Car is a mess
*Chain on bike always falling off
*Computer or I Pad screen always dirty
*Flowers and plants always die
*Kitchen sink always filled with dishes
*Home never clean
*Not enough room for car or bike in garage
*Significant other doesn’t call or show up when they say they will
*Not happy about being overweight
*Lack of strength physically
*Lack of strength emotionally
*Low self confidence
*Not enough sleep
*Unhappy with hairstyle
*Beauty products not doing the trick
*Not enough alone time
*Don’t have an extra car or house key
*Schedule forces getting up too early
*Needy relatives
*Eating too much sugar or salt
*Drinking too much alcohol
*Negative attitudes from people in your life
*Low energy levels
*Poor grades
*Smoking
*Lack of boundaries with people
*Co dependency
*Too much junk email
*Too much time on Facebook
*Unmade bed
*Moldy shower
*Disrespectful roommate
*Not enough exercise
*Not drinking enough water
*Not enough time with friends
*Lack of fun

So if your life is feeling a bit out of whack and chaotic, give this simple exercise a try:

1.  Find a quiet place and visualize each of the nine areas of your life listed above one at a time. As you do, write down all the tolerations within each area.
2.  Commit to removing 3-5 tolerations per week over the next month.
3.  Watch the magic happen as your life feels more in control and balanced!

Good Luck and please let me know how this simple exercise has worked for you.
For more information on what I offer, please visit www.onpointcoaching.net

Warmly,

Meg Daly
Career and Life Coach
On Point Coaching
262-2921331




Wednesday, June 5, 2013

marathon training schedule

Alright here's my training schedule. I was able to run 6 miles without a problem before I started training BUT even if you can't do that, it's still possible! Just gradually increase your distance every time. You can even alternate between running and walking. If you're new to running, alternate 2 minutes of running, and 1 minute of walking. If you're more experienced, maybe run a mile and walk for a minute. This is the beauty of training- you can do it however you want! 

You could also use this to train for a half marathon (13.1 miles) but I would suggest maybe doing the first 5 weeks twice, depending on when your race is and your running capabilities. 

I adapted this from fitsugar.com but they had the long runs on Saturdays. That wasn't gonna fly with me. If you're a more trained runner, feel free to skip to about week 4 or 5. That's what I did at least. 

Also, you can switch which days you do certain runs just make sure the mileage per week remains the same. However, check to make sure you're resting/cross training the day before and after your long runs to give your muscles adequate time to recover. 

Sorry it's a little blurry...

Save this image and print it off or make sure to write it down. I can't stress enough how much more motivated I was to work out when I knew that I had to. If you write it into your daily schedule, it forces you to keep that commitment you made to yourself. 

Like I said before, do what works for you. That being said, feel free to switch up the days or vary the mileage slightly to fit your needs. 

As for cross training, some days I just took off to rest, other days I did simple activities like yoga or the elliptical. Sometimes I would do the stair stepper when I was feeling ambitious.  Most weeks, however, I just did some of the weight training workouts from the Nike Training Club app (it's free!). I did a combination of the "Get Focused" workouts where you can choose to work your legs, back, abs, arms, or butt.

And in case you need any further motivation: 




Tuesday, June 4, 2013

a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step

After running my first marathon last Sunday, crossing the finish line was surreal; however, the greater feeling was knowing all the support I had from other people. After the race I had so many people tell me how proud they were of me, but what really blew me away was all the people who later told me that I inspired them to run a marathon or just start running in general. Let me tell ya, that is what keeps me going on days when I don't feel like running. 



When people heard that I was training for a marathon, 96.5% of the people said "Wow, I could never do that." No, you just think you can't. To tell you the truth, I didn't think I ever could run a marathon either. It just seemed like an impossible goal I would save for "someday".  I didn't even know that a half marathon was in the picture. With just a little lot of training, heart, and dedication you- yes you!- can run a marathon. Because after all, 

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." (Lao-tzu) 

No matter what your goals in life, you have to start somewhere and sometimes you have to do the things that scare you the most. Let me tell you, I was completely terrified to run my marathon. I thought it was more realistic that I'd be passed out somewhere in a ditch than actually cross the finish line. Before I started training, I had only run probably 7 miles for my farthest run. I was always a sprinter, but suddenly I found myself running 17 miles. How did this happen?! Yes, there were days when I wished I didn't have to run but I knew that in the end it would all pay off- and it 100% did. For me that single step was setting a goal for myself. Pretty soon one step turned into one mile, and one mile turned into 26.2. In the words of Drake- "started from the bottom now we're here." 



You could say I've always been a very competitive person, but that'd be an understatement. In soccer and lacrosse, I wanted to be the fastest, strongest, most talented girl out there. If we didn't win, I'd get pretty upset knowing that we weren't the best. Now that I wasn't in sports in college I needed to find a way to channel that competitiveness into something. I tried being competitive in school but that wasn't the same. I realized I better stick to what I love-- running. When it got to the longer runs, I remember getting mad at myself, thinking that I was stupid to think that I could run a marathon. I wanted to stop so many times, but something in me couldn't do it. I remember my coaches in high school always telling me to "use your head"- that the smartest players often come out on top. And now that finally made sense. Running is almost all in your head. 

"Whether you think you can or you can't, you're right." (Henry Ford)


It's all about the 'tude. I know this sounds so cliche but you can do it! Whatever your goal may be, always remember that you can (and will!) push yourself a little farther. You'd be surprised how much more you can accomplish when you do. Another quote that really gets me going is

"Your mind gives up before your legs do."

You can do so much more than you've ever imagined. I'm living proof. And believe me, I am no different than you. It's not can you- It's will you? 



So go out there and show 'em who's boss! And remember that just because someone else did something, doesn't mean you have to accomplish the same thing.

"Don't measure yourself against someone else's standards, because who knows? Maybe they're too low for you anyway"


"The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday." 

Do something today that you will be proud of tomorrow. Pretty soon all those simple steps will turn into a thousand miles.